Nine Years Married

Jenna Kutcher 

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August 20, 2020


You’d think that after almost a decade of celebrating our wedding anniversary, these posts would just flow, but in truth, I feel like the years move faster and the words flow easier between Drew and myself in private than trying to write the sentiment to translate on a screen for strangers on the internet to read. It’s surreal that next year will be our 10th anniversary, and it hits me every year how quickly time truly passes.

I can close my eyes and remember particular moments from our wedding day, moments where we grabbed one another’s hand and encouraged each other to take it all in, to “pause” that moment to memory. Over the last nine years, we’ve shared a lot of those moments together, where we grab hands, lock eyes with a quiet nod, and remember to commit what’s before us to memory.

It’s wild to think of the life we’ve experienced since that day we said “I do” at the altar of the church where I was baptized. We’ve experienced triumph, heartbreak, change, growth. And we’ve evolved into the people we were meant to become while watching one another transform into new versions of ourselves.

My fondest memories from our wedding day

Marriage is the act of choosing to recommit and live out your vows on the daily, an act that we’ve been fortunate to do for nine straight years. And while I don’t think anyone fully understands the weight of the words they say at the altar, I am grateful for each verse we repeated because it’s given us a guide as we walk through life together. I am so grateful that I not only love, but I like the person I get to do life alongside.

We smile whenever we pick up take-out from the pizza joint that catered our wedding (and it’s still to-die-for, by the way). We remember that feeling of looking out from our dinner spot and seeing all of the people we love gathered in one spot while our local folk band plucked tunes.

We laugh when we find my $358 wedding dress, still dirty from the electric slide and Cupid Shuffle, that we’ve somehow transported from house to house in case I ever decide to actually preserve it (it’s looking doubtful at this point!). We still dance to the Alexi Murdoch song that seemed to go on forever and ever as we swayed around the dance floor, we and chuckle at the fact that our cake (baked by the same baker who made my parents’ wedding cake) tipped over.

What that day still means to me now

Our wedding was simple, joyful, and focused on what mattered most to us then. Our lives are a reflection of those things to this day: the simple joy from music, our love of delicious pizza, and a desire to be present making memories with the people we love the most.

I can’t wait to see what’s next for us. Drew, dreaming next to you (especially now that Coco sleeps through the night!) is the biggest blessing and watching you as a dad is my greatest joy. Thank you for loving us through and through, yesterday, today, and tomorrow, too.

I still vow to love you without caution. I still vow to encourage you to chase your dreams, because through them your soul shines. I still promise to laugh with you, cry with you, grow old with you in mind and spirit, and always be open and honest with you. I will cherish you for a lifetime, for one lifetime will never be enough.

What I’m celebrating today

When I think back to that 23-year-old who couldn’t wait to marry her love, I smile. I love her and want to hug her and protect her all at the same time. And I didn’t know what Drew and I would have to face together, but I knew I wanted to do life with him by my side. 

I think one of the very special ingredients in our marriage is that as we’ve grown into who we were meant to become, we’ve grown into each other. We are both entirely different humans than we were on that day nine years ago, but as we’ve evolved and matured and contradicted ourselves and pressed on, we’ve continued to lean in to every new version of each other. By the end of our lives, we’ll have seen so many variations of self and love and marriage in our time together- what an adventure, right? 

Maybe it’s just this year, or this little episode of life, or, hey, even this week (catch my drift), but I’m feeling a very present desire to… sustain this slowdown. To simply bask in and embrace this chance to keep my feet on the ground and my suitcase unpacked and even a little dusty.

It’s safe to say that the magic of this year has come in such unexpected ways, but as we celebrate (probably with dinner on the porch and grapefruit margs) I am just thankful for this chance to grow with someone who loves me wholly, openly, freely. Cheers to many more years of being open and honest so that we can keep tackling life together, however we feel led, and today I’m vowing those same promises we said ages ago, because that’s one thing our 23-year-old selves got right. 

Photo by: Indigo Child 

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  1. Charity says:

    What is your go to grapefruit margs recipe???


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A small town Minnesota photographer, podcaster, educator and puppy rescuer, my happiest days are spent behind my computer screen sharing my secrets with the world. I'm glad you're here.

I’m an expert at online marketing, a nerd when it comes to the numbers, and my obsession is teaching others how to make a living doing what they love (without it taking over their life). 

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