“you’re beautiful. you are treasured, you are sacred, you are his.”
i have a confession to make, i compare myself to others.
if i had a dollar for every time i looked at someones images and sighed in exasperation that i could never do that, i would be writing this from a tropical island with a margarita in hand. instead i am still in bed, snuggled with pups, and a not-so-hot cup of coffee, thus there is no one who actually delivers on those “if i had a dollar” statements. i am sure you can relate on some scope of what i am about to say. from lusting over outfits on pinterest, to those long legs of heidi klum, to another photographers photos… we’ve all been there. with social media making everything accessible at our fingertips, i had made some conscious efforts to limit my time spent networking and increase my time focusing on my goals. that need to always be connected, to not miss a beat, to see what everyone else is doing in those fabulous lives of theirs…
i know this is cheesy, but bear with me. i read a quote that the only photographer you should compare yourself to is the one you used to be… insert cheese ball, but there is a lot of truth in those words. just like any job you might have, it is easy to look at others and feel like you might never get there, that they have the magic potion that you haven’t gotten your hands on. this past year was a year of crazy growth for me, to look back makes me cringe in delight over the ways i have changed – yes, i just used cringe and delight in the same sentence. it a creative industry it can be hard to constantly deliver original work, a lot of us look at the same magazines for inspiration, follow the same blog, use the same cameras. what i have learned this year is no one has my eyes, no one sees moments the way i do. i could teach people my entire process from start to finish and we would deliver entirely different products, that is what makes this job so great.
in a world that is constantly allowing us access at the touch of a finger, it is so important to disconnect and focus on what it is you want. i don’t want my little thumb to run a marathon on my phone screen every time i have some spare minutes. yet, in reality unless i make a feeble attempt and take action to make changes, nothing will happen. i have to remind myself that a lot of what i see are people’s “highlight reels.” think about it, social media allows us to access just about everyone, you want to put your best foot out there, you want to appear like you have it all together, you post things that cast you in a glorious light. what we don’t see are the bloopers, the behind the scenes, the late nights and the piles of paperwork. social media, as beautiful as it is, is not a look at reality, it is a glamorous look at a life we wish we lived all the time… right? i often have to check myself because i want this blog to be authentic, i want it to be real and candid. i want to keep it light hearted and fun, but somedays we just need to get real… you feel me, boo?
making steps to stop the comparison is so important, whether it is only visiting blogs that inspire you or “unliking” face book pages to fill your feed with less gorgeousness that may leave you doubting. sometimes it is hard to figure out what triggers you into a pool of self doubt. regardless of what works for you, you need to make intentional steps to refocus your efforts and continue improving. the grass isn’t always greener and it is so easy to forget about all we have accomplished, so stop comparing and start with confidence. as silly as words of affirmation may sound, they work. tell yourself how great you are doing, look back at the work you used to do and see the changes, think about the steps you have taken to build a business you are proud of. when i think back to the girl who was shooting on auto and editing in picnik, i have come a heck of a long way. it didn’t always come easily, but it has one blessed journey. when i find myself wallowing in self doubt, i shut the computer, move around, shake it out, and start fresh. now is the time to celebrate your victories, set your goals, and focus on growth. ready? GO!
what changes are you making to refocus on your goals and stop comparing yourself to everyone else?
You have a gift for saying what most of us are thinking. I don’t always catch your blogs, but when I do it’s always like a breath of fresh air. Honest and real, I really admire those qualities! I’m a newbie photographer and there are so many times when I feel so unworthy to do be in this business, but I often remind myself that all of us had a beginning… be it glamorous or unglamorous. As long as there is always growth in my work that is all that matters. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us 🙂
Great post! There is an awesome quote floating around Pinterest right now that says something like, “Don’t compare your beginning to someone else’s middle.” Such an awesome reminder that everyone had a beginning, a starting point, and where they are now is not what they were when they started!
Thank you. Needed this.